The Boomer Grind - "No One Ever Told Me"

At times, life can be a grind. Grind is defined by Encarta Dictionary - as to push something down firmly or crush something on a surface with a twisting or rotating motion (like grinding dirt into the carpet).

The life of a Boomer has become a grind. The early days of this grind began when I heard this statement, for the first time, forty years ago... "No one ever told me!" (and, think about the song, American Pie, "the day the music died...")

• "No one ever told me about inflation and high interest rates!" ,,,

When Does The Leader Make A Difference?

This blog title began germinating early last week week after a friend posted a link to an article "People Don't Leave Companies, They Leave Leaders." 

By the end of the week, he let me know he had left his job. I'm assuming he had considered his departure and the article may have quickened his decision. We get together this coming week and I'll find out more.

The premise of the article - it really is all about the quality of the leadership. This should be a quick kick in the rear for anyone in a leadership role. Being the leader really does mean - within the domain of your authority, everything and everyone is your responsibility. A leader is absolutely held accountable for what they think, do and say. In the case of this friend, the difference the leader made appears to not be positive for the company.

If the leader is not learning why good people are leaving that leader may not realize good people won't put up with low quality leadership. (later in this blog, you can learn how to measure the quality of leadership) 

If a leader is not willing to learn why people are leaving, they are not learning to think differently and they will not act differently. They keep doing the same thing expecting different results. Such leaders keep running off good people and eventually attract only people who will put up with a low quality leader. The result is the low quality leader finally gets fired. Einstein identified that as insanity. And, there is a solution for leaders who are willing to think and act differently than they have in the past.

Leaders Need A Roadmap In Order To Meet People Where They Are

Whenever I hear stories of good people leaving because of the leader, it makes me wonder if both the leader and the employee have a roadmap so each knows where the other is on the map. While they may have clearly defined job descriptions, I find very few leaders truly have the capability to meet people where they are. 

In other words, does a leader know:

• What's important to the employee? 
• What are their development or resource needs so they can excel at their job? 

Most leaders want people to meet the leader where they are. Ironically the leader expects people to do this without any kind of roadmap. By the way an organizational chart is not a roadmap.

Thousands of books and millions of articles about leadership attempt to define the traits and characteristics of leaders and create labels for the various types of leaders. Traits, characteristics and labels are like the streets, roads, cities and towns on a roadmap. Very important information, but it's only of value when you can accurately pinpoint where you are on the roadmap, making it easy for you to plan how to get to your destination.

Without a leadership roadmap, leaders typically wander around making it difficult for others to follow. A wandering leader (most don't know they are wandering), will not ever truly get to the heart and soul of WHEN and how authentic leadership makes all the difference. 

This infographic is a basic leadership roadmap I use with leaders. After an initial use of this infographic, it becomes easy to tailor a leadership roadmap to any leader and/or any situation. Take a moment to review before you read the rest of this blog.

How To Know The "WHEN"

A leader who understands the "when" of leadership will know the right thing to do, with the right people at the right time. This takes ongoing practice, making a leadership roadmap essential.

Yet, even with the roadmap, the "when" of leadership is like looking for the hidden image in an autostereogram. Autostereograms are computer generated 2D images that create 3D visual illusions in the brain. Sometimes you see it and sometimes you don't. It takes practice and skill to be able to consistently see the hidden images.

While any leader can look at a 2D image (what's easy to see about a situation), authentic leaders have developed the skill and knowing to consistently see the hidden 3D images (what's driving a situation). When the leader can clearly understand the how, why and what of leadership, it becomes easier for them to know when they are most likely to make a meaningful difference.

Why A Leader Struggles With The When - Low Capacity

Based upon my personal leadership experience and numerous opportunities to work with leaders at all levels, I know a leader begins to leave their struggles behind when the leader fully embraces the concept that an authentic leader is one who serves versus being served. 

The moment they become a servant-focused leader their leadership roadmap becomes like the autostereogram and the "when" becomes like the hidden 3D images. Not easy to see, but consistent practice starts producing different and meaningful results. And, other people begin to see how quality leadership makes a difference. 

No matter how much a leader knows about leadership, it is only when the leader genuinely understands that leadership competencies only make a difference when integrated with a servant-focus. When a leader has this understanding they know how and what to do, why they do it and, most importantly, the right time (when) to do it. 

Time and again, during conversations with leaders, the less their servant-focus, the lower their capacity for dealing with all the people, situations, changes and uncertainties that come with the role of leader. A leader with low capacity will struggle. It is easy to recognize a struggling leader because you will hear them make "either/or" type statements. They will say things like, "Either Joe gets with the program or he will be fired!" 

The leader's comments and opinions are typically stated as if everything is either black or white. This same leader will also have wide and abrupt mood swings. They blame others and often even appear bipolar. A leader with low capacity is easily overwhelmed and has very little self control to take time to think "gray" about a situation versus always reacting in a black or white manner. The lower a leader's capacity, the lower their ability to exercise genuine leadership competencies.

An authentic leader will be just the opposite of this "either/or" type leader. The authentic leader will be skilled at "both/and" thinking. Both/And thinking opens an authentic leader's mind to new possibilities (see the gray), making it easier to see when to do the right things. They have trained their brain to see the when, like being able to see the autostereogram 3D images, in their mind. An authentic leader will have the capacity to think through a variety of scenarios until they are able to know when to act and with whom.

How To Instantly Measure Authentic Leadership

The infographic is called a ZMap. For a leader this ZMap empowers you to quickly pinpoint which quadrant best defines your current level of leadership. Once you pinpoint where you are, it becomes easy to design your development plan to get to where you want to be. If you work with a leader, you can use this same ZMap to gain some insight, understanding and appreciation for a leader's quality of leadership.

While the topic of leadership can be a very complex discussion, this ZMap quickly cuts through all the noise. Once you know where you are it is simple to plan the journey to your destination. Authentic, sustainable leaders have developed a personal leadership roadmap though trial and error. They use it to know when to do the right thing with the right people at the right time.

A leader can use this simple ZMap to quickly develop a personal leadership roadmap much faster than the traditional leadership development processes. When you know where you are on this ZMap, you can instantly focus on what you need and know where to find or ask for the right resources to help you improve your quality of leadership.

It Begins With Being Honest With Yourself

Answer these two statements and pinpoint where they intersect on the ZMap. 

• Rank your Leadership Competencies. (Y axis) The higher your knowledge and execution of quality leadership competencies, the higher your point on the Y axis.
• Rank your Servant-Focus. (X axis) The more time you spend thinking about serving those who work with you and actually doing and being a servant leader, the further out on the X axis is your pinpoint.

Based upon where these two points intersect, what are your thoughts about where you find yourself on the ZMap and what actions do you see you need to take to get to where you want to be? 

When I work with leaders, this simple ZMap gets the two of us on the same page and engaged into a meaningful discussion that creates immediate and lasting value for the leader. More information on how to plan your leadership development journey will be shared in future blogs. 

My experience is those leaders who genuinely want to improve will take this ZMap and get started by first observing what they think, say and do - and begin making appropriate changes. This blog reviews how to become a skillful thinker.

I encourage you to do the same. You will be amazed at how quickly you begin to start thinking differently and experiencing when your leadership makes positive, meaningful differences for others.

Best to your becoming a servant-focused leader.

~ Alan Goldsberry, Author and CEO of ZFactor Group Publishing

ZFactor blog explores and discusses a variety of techniques, tools and discoveries by successful people that will assist others to achieve greater personal and professional success. ZFactor is a proprietary coaching methodology based upon the premise that successful people think and act differently. The ZFactor methodology is proven to accelerate a person's ability to think and act differently.

The Best Way To Become A Sustainable Leader!

Anyone truly serious about becoming a highly capable, sustainable leader can easily find leadership development opportunities in any number of community, school or worship communities. It doesn't make any difference about your age or whether you have ever been in a leadership role or you have years of experience in management and leadership roles. If you genuinely desire to develop your leadership skills, get involved in serving others.

One of my "just curious" questions I ask leaders is to give a quick history of their volunteer service, starting with high school. Those leaders with consistent volunteer service are simply more mature, sustainable, servant-minded leaders. Individuals who get involved in service work in high school and college will have numerous opportunities to experience leading others. They are also the ones who will experience faster personal, professional and leadership growth than their peers in the workplace.

Likewise, for anyone at any age. Even if you didn't take advantage of such opportunities in your early years and you think you have limited opportunities where you work, then today is always a good day to get involved and become a volunteer. Find an organization you can truly believe in their purpose and mission. You will not only experience personal growth, but you will be serving others and making a difference in other people's lives.

If you are older, wiser and more experienced, don't think you should immediately be on the board of directors. Get your hands in the dirt. That means be willing to work alongside others and do whatever is needed, especially the grunt work. Really get to know other people who are serving. The key thing to remember - It's not about you. Be like the Undercover Boss.

Anyone who gets involved and is willing to do whatever is needed will find new doors opening up for them in the workplace. it was three young guys in 1920 who wanted more management responsibility in their respective companies. The opportunities weren't there and changing jobs was not an option, so they began doing service projects in the community. Soon, others joined them, the young men got promotions at work and they created the United States Jaycees. 

I believe the future is one of incredible opportunity as I watch young people today get involved in serving others. It's as if volunteering is genetic for them. Imagine the future our emerging leaders are building!

And, if you are a boomer retiring and looking for something to do and find yourself sometimes complaining about today's youth. Become a volunteer. You will find numerous opportunities for mentoring.

Happy Volunteering and Making A Difference,


~ Alan Goldsberry, Author and CEO of ZFactor Group Publishing

ZFactor blog explores and discusses a variety of techniques, tools and discoveries by successful people that will assist others to achieve greater personal and professional success. ZFactor is a proprietary coaching methodology based upon the premise that successful people think and act differently. The ZFactor methodology is proven to accelerate a person's ability to think and act differently.

Thanks to Karrie, whose post in the LinkedIn Servant Leadership Group inspired this blog!

I Say Merry Christmas, What Do You Say?

My amazing wife, Cindy, declared last week, she wants to be more engaging with people relative to the upcoming holiday season. Rather than just say, "Happy Holidays" she wants to be more engaging with people and get to know them better than just responding, "Happy Holidays to You."

You have to know Cindy to understand the way she thinks about other people. First, she really cares about other people and she has a quality about herself that when others are around her, they just love Cindy.

Cindy says to me, "Instead of waiting for others to say, Happy Holidays, I'm going to say - I say +Merry Christmas, what do you say?" Her reasoning is pretty simple. She wants others to know she values being a Christian and does not want to water down her belief because of some political correctness. And, most importantly she wants others to feel comfortable in expressing their personal values, as well. It's about honoring other people and the result is you get to know a little more about them.

With a little thought about this on my part - we live in a vibrant, highly mobile, multi-cultural society. If we truly want world peace for our progeny, we need to be responsible for understanding and getting to know who other people are. If I just say, "Merry Christmas" without offering the option to others to express their belief, I can sound rude and politically incorrect. That behavior does not represent the love of Christ nor does it open the door for any further engaging conversations. If I merely say, "Happy Holidays" that is not expressing who I am. This is obviously the quandary many of us have experienced in these politically correct decades, but then if you know Cindy like I know Cindy, you too will take pause and ponder upon what she says - and, consider what you will say.

So, I tried out Cindy's saying and surprisingly it opened up some interesting discussions that would have never happen if I had blindly said, "Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays." After a couple of times I began to realize that it really is about relationship and honoring the relationships we have with others, especially with those we have just met or know professionally. Yep, I now have to admit to my wife, I'm a little slow and for the first time ever - she has thought of something before me. (and if you believe that, well, I can find the perfect coach for you.)

The responses to me saying, "I say Merry Christmas, what do you say" have typically been a chuckle and then they say, "Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays" and we all go on our merry way. A couple of the responses have been a chuckle and they say, "I'm Jewish and I say Happy Hanukkah." I respond, "Happy Hanukkah." It's about honoring who people are, getting to know them a little better, and since I'm a Christian - being more like Christ.

No matter your background, religion or race, 'tis the season to take a moment and be more loving with others. As I understand it, Jesus was born into a Jewish family and a group of Magi (from Persia - some might say pre-Muslim) came to visit him and present him gifts upon his birth. And, those gifts provided safe passage for Jesus and family to escape the slaughter of the children by King Herod. I'm figuring God has a plan and, in his infinite wisdom, He is giving us time to figure it out.

Be kind and loving to others who think and act differently than you,

~ Alan Goldsberry, Author and CEO of ZFactor Group Publishing